Bad Blood is the best action movie of this year, fight me

Okay, I know we’re only at the beginning of the summer and I haven’t even seen Mad Max: Fury Road yet but I’m prepared to say that Taylor Swift’s music video for “Bad Blood” is the best action movie of this year.

Here is everything good about sci-fi action movies. All of these things are in her video:

  • Badass looking but actually incredibly impractical weapons and outfits
  • Ridiculous awesome futuristic makeup that will is already kinda ridiculous but will probably look super dated in like 2 years
  • That thing where someone’s awesome superhero name comes up on the screen after they do something cool
  • Three-point landings
  • Windows shattering in slow motion as people get thrown through them
  • Sci-fi looking lighting schemes that are in those computer-y motherboard-type patterns
  • Boots
  • Shaking hair out after taking off a motorcycle helmet
  • Tron bikes

Here is everything boring about sci-fi action movies. None of these things are in her video:

  • People getting their cool outfits all dirty in ways that doesn’t even look cool and then staying like that for the whole rest of the movie, just to show how “gritty” it is
  • Grittiness in general
  • The male protagonist’s female loved ones getting fridged so he can develop as a character
  • Male protagonists wincing a lot and looking angry/constipated
  • Male protagonist character arcs in general
  • Male protagonists
  • Men in general (Kendrick Lamar excepted)

I would stiletto-saunter over the corpses of a hundred Age of Ultrons for a feature film based on this music video. This is a post-Jupiter Ascending world, people. Give us what we want: 2 hours of Taylor Swift featuring 400 outfits and guest starring literally every woman in the music industry or Hollywood or whoever with each one getting a cool name and an original outfit and weapon.

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